ADHD and the FierceFamily

Jamama: How do you know you have ADHD?

Non:I know I have ADHD because I can never sit still. I can’t keep track of my things. My room is SuPeR dirty. I forget stuff all the time, this one time I was on a camping trip and in the middle of the drive there I said,”Oh darn-it I forgot my water bottle and Dartainian (my favorite stuffed animal) at the house.” Continue Reading »

Ask Tim. I have invented no less than 20 versions of a “chore chart” for each of us. I’ve tried this software, laminated picture charts, flat-out bribes, point systems, a game called “Chore Chore Revolution” and more. For example, here’s a picture of the sticker chore game-board we used to use. The goal was to cover as much of the board as possible. The more squares covered with stickers, the better the prize.

But here’s my (current) favorite. I printed out the chores on my labeler. Then I printed out little symbols that Row picked.

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Mel Levine seems like such a nice, empathic guy. The way he writes about the struggles that students have makes me wish I could go to him and have him solve the puzzle of all of my challenges. Maybe most importantly, I want Dr. Levine to explain those challenges to me in a way that makes me feel as empathic towards myself as he sounds towards his patients. Continue Reading »

I can’t help it. I really love my labeler.

I read that statement and think, “Criminy - get a LIFE!” But I have a life, and that is precisely why I love my labeler. When you can’t keep things in your head, you have to write them down somewhere, right? So, we made this huge calendar to keep track of all of the crazy daily stuff we need to know. For example, is it P.E. day (in which case, one must wear gym shoes) or “media” day (in which case, one must frantically ransack the house seeking the missing library book)? Or, is the school lunch both vegetarian and edible today or must we pack a lunch? And, who, exactly, is taking care of Non and Row today?

So, we got this white board, drew six weeks worth of squares on it (in permanent ink), and were ready to rock and roll (or, at least, to show up most places we’re supposed to be). But it’s overwhelming. Plus, dry erase markers actually erase permanent marker on white boards. You also have to re-write all of the regularly occurring stuff (e.g., Row buys pizza every Friday). Continue Reading »

I had a teen experience that embraced a lot of things. Let’s just say I did not behave responsibly. Maybe I was self-medicating, maybe not. I am self aware enough to not blame everything on my ADD and maybe I just made bad choices with my health and safety because I didn’t have any sense. I don’t regret it, but I sure do fear the thought of my kids (whom I happen to love more than myself), trying the same kinds of things.

Eventually I stopped doing all that. Not because I decided it was wrong, dangerous, or a waste of money. Mostly it was because I just didn’t have the time, and I stopped being around other people who were still doing it. I guess I grew up. And had the good fortune to be able to walk away from things that others had more trouble with.

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We were supposed to go camping this weekend with the Girl Scouts and instead there was a hefty storm here. So, I read two books we recently checked out from the library for the kids: Joey Pigza Swallowed the Key and Joey Pigza Loses Control. CommonSense Media review here.

Joey is a 4th grader with ADHD that is inadequately treated with medication, and is not treated with any other method. I found these books simultaneously entertaining and kind of depressing. Joey goes through lots of wacky highjinks and well-intended acts that end in disaster. Like the reviewer at CommonSense, I like that adults that live and work with Joey are not villanized - a very flawed and human bunch of well-meaning folks. But, the picture of ADHD is severe. Joey is unintentionally dangerous to himself and others, as many kids with ADHD can be - but to a really significant degree (he jumps from the rafters of a barn, he runs with scissors and chops off the end of a classmate’s nose, he pierces his dog’s ear with a dart, sticks his finger in a pencil sharpener, etc.). Both of his parents are alcoholics. His teacher’s idea of a behavior management plan is to tape a list of rules to his desk and to send him to the “Special Ed room” when he breaks them. Continue Reading »

My name is Row and I’m 6. To have ADHD is sort of hard. You can’t really remember things. And sometimes you forget what to say. Like right now, I’m forgetting what to say. And sometimes it makes me a little nervous to be in front of a lot and a lot of people. That’s all I can say. Bye! Oh. I didn’t mean to say bye. I meant to say, it gives me lots and lots of energy. It is not fun to have. It makes me feel like I want to move every single day. Every single millisecond. Now, I really mean Bye! That’s it. I mean, it makes you bored all the time. But sometimes it makes you hyper. Now I super duper mean B-B-Y-Y-E-E - Bye! bye! bye! bye! bye! bye! bye! bye! (I’m going to say that 100 times.) [Comment from jamama: he did.]